Rust : Herp, Derp, and the Russian Hunter

I regain consciousness on the sandy shores of some distant beach. Waves lap gently against the shore like some long lost summer vacation. It takes me a moment but finally I get up. The sea stretches out beyond me. Turning about I get my first shock.

Naked men. Lots of them. This beach has more sausage than Oktoberfest. Behind them is a hill, rocks, forests, some strange looking fortresses rise up, and what could be a distant satellite dish.

Where the hell am I?

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